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almost there

almost there - Conquistador China*
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You want to think that the things you do have value.

You want to believe that if you really try hard and put your heart into something, it will all work out. After all, the fact that you made an effort to be someone who contributed to the greater good instead of coasting on other people's labors - shouldn't that count for something? Industriousness is a virtue, and virtues are rewarded, by the consumers who care about things that are made with pride and dignity. What would it mean - what would it say about the very nature of the world itself - if the cheaters were the ones who got the reward? If the buyers bought the cheap, substandard knockoffs and the people who stole your ideas were the ones who prospered? If the very thing that you put your heart and soul into - your dream - bankrupted you, and everything you did wound up forgotten in some old crumbling factory, smashed by vandals and burned by arsonists?

Wouldn't that colossal failure indicate that hope itself is a sham? Wouldn't it justify turning away from the very notion of ambition and hiding your fleeting desires down deep where they can never be crushed? Wouldn't it prove once and for all that the world is an unjust place and that there is no room for idealism, that the path of the cynic and doubter is the true way?

But it's not like that. Work hard, get rewarded. Close your eyes, keep the focus. You're almost there.

"almost there" taken at Conquistador China*.
Photograph and text by Matthew Christopher of Abandoned America.

Also in: Conquistador China*

so it is within
if only
ars moriendi